Why “Letting Go” Is A Fallacy
(… and is keeping you in unnecessary loops of powerlessness 🤦🏼♀️)
The next time you are told to just “let it go” - please stop and take a breath.
The next time you hear yourself paraphrasing some jazzed-up insta meme to your friend “I’m just like, totally, gunna let it go, you know” - please stop and take a breath.
The next time you find yourself spiralling, berating yourself for being a failure, for not being able to “let go” of it/him/her/them/the thing/the situation/the memory/the relationship faster, better, more effectively - please stop and take a breath.
Please, just stop. Breathe.
Things you can actually let go of as a human:
- A dog lead whilst walking your dog
- An employee
- The rope in tug of war
Things you can not simply ‘let go’ of because a meme or personal development coach told you to:
- Suppressed emotion, trust issues and unworthiness causing the underlying core beliefs that are actually driving you to feel you need to ‘let go’ of XYZ (ie. your ex, that situation at work, that repeating pattern of self-sabotage of yours, your family member doing that thing again).
- Unresolved trauma that has shaped your nervous system into habits, behaviours, actions from self-protection, which are now likely causing a physiological *addiction* to the XYZ or pattern of XYZ which you wish to simply ‘let go’
- Attachment to the identity of who you are in relation to the relationship/situation/thing you wish to “let go” of
- Fear of who you will become on the other side of letting go of XYZ; fear about whether you will be safe, whether you will give away too much of your *power*, or whether it will be *too much* power for you to know what to do with
- Negative energy patterning causing the distortion in your field keeping you in a left-brain loop of fear-based rationality, parading as your identity
And the true energy-workers amongst us know. We know when you’ve said ‘yep I don’t need to work on that, I’ve let that go’ when you actually haven’t. We are highly-attuned to the incongruence in your field. We see it, we feel it, we sense it.
Here’s the thing.
We are energy (duh... we’re all across that by now, yeah?)
Chemistry 101:
No energy can be created or destroyed;
Only *transformed*
Thus, the concept of “letting go” in the realm of healing/thriving/evolving/living/loving is a fallacy.
If a professional is trying to sell you this **Without** The Emotional-Alchemy Frameworks + Tools to support you in understanding how to TRANSFORM the energy at the root of the person/pattern/situation/belief you wish to ‘let go’ -
I invite you to,
Please stop and take a breath -
And
back
away
slowly.
I mean, sprint the hell away if you want to.
If you have ALREADY been sold this idea and are sick of beating yourself up for being a failure of a human; for not having ‘let go’ of XYZ better.. for repeating cycles.. for knowing you wish to be *THERE* (which is usually not a destination of course rather YOU in your full power) but so frustrated at yourself because you keep looping around *HERE* (in your powerlessness, unhelpful patterns, and inner-war)...
Please know there is nothing wrong with you.
You have not failed.
You are not powerless.
Now you get to make a choice with this new awareness of how you will respond moving forward.
Similarly if you are a counsellor/coach/leader, utilising this phrase in your work *without providing the necessary emotional-alchemy training* no need to berate yourself. No doubt you’ve done the best you could with what you knew. It is time to get honest with yourself about the limitations of your practices, and source the *true* training you require to be of highest service to your clients/students/people.
So...
Let go of the dog lead, yes.
Let go of unresolved emotions without *TRUE* mastery or guidance in emotional-alchemy, no.
Just, no.
Originally written and published 12/01/2021